let’s talk

Let’s talk about love

You inspired me to write, you always do

Lately, every word has been about heartbreak

I do not remember us this way, but this is how it feels today

Your smile, it always lifts me, it reminds me of how my father smiles at my mommy

But, my heart, baby, this is nothing my parents thought me

I miss you every day, I wish I could call you to say…

But instead, I will write the words that are dedicated to you

On this day.. ring, ring.. hi baby.. call me.

 

 

Unedited poem (been drinking)

I will be posting more of my longer length poems. It is unedited, raw version of my words. You may see typos, weird phrase combinations, I read it once, fix the format and post. I wanted to share this side of my writing. Thank you for reading me.

Enjoy 🙂

Drunk on nonsense

Hard to drive on the road to salvation

I’m intoxicated with my impatience

The view is blurred by my ego In the mirror, my past is closer than it appears Carpooling with my struggles and my fears…

I had way too much to drink

The smell of vodka and rum makes me sick

Everything I thought I knew slip my mind in a second

I’m standing here trying to make my life a bit less dramatic

Without giving out the specifics I’m without a doubt nostalgic

Haven’t done anything special since my son I’m nothing good, but I’m nothing wrong I just wish my poetry would be in your favourite song

Then I could officially be a writer… a poet…

Something special that hits your hearts with rhymes and lyrics

Until then, let me drown in my nonsense

Refill my glass with regrets and maybe use it all for new material on my next set.

Unedited poem (birthday reminder)

Unedited poem post. If you did not know yet, I will be posting more of my longer length poems. It is unedited, raw version of my words. You may see typos, weird phrase combinations, I read it once, fix the format and post. I wanted to share this side of my writing. Thank you for reading me. Enjoy 🙂

Somethings didn’t sink in until my digits flipped

Can’t be bitter about getting older, it correlates with being wiser

Time-lapse allowing me to see my prayers getting answers

Age defined by more than a few wrinkles

To solely focus on this makes us human and comical

I am closer to who I was born to be

And for that, I am excited, ready and forever grateful

The struggle is hard but man… It’s beautiful

Unedited poem (sleep deprived)

Unedited poem post. If you did not know yet, I will be posting more of my longer length poems. It is unedited, raw version of my words. You may see typos, weird phrase combinations, I read it once, fix the format and post. I wanted to share this side of my writing. Thank you for reading me. Enjoy 🙂

Sleep gets in the way of my dreams, and my dreams deprive me of sleep

I’m tired, but no matter how many sheeps I count I can’t fall out of my reality

There’s a light, I felt it shine on my face

I concluded that God got many more blessing for me in place

I’ve been paid and ordered some patience, but it arrived late

It came to meet me  at the door, but brought a couple of bad experiences with it

My pain was enhanced but blessed me with wisdom

My path was simple, somehow I thought it was a bit complicated

But that was me living in my everyday mistakes

I aimed for peace in my heart and home, and so many doors opened.

Made my desires relevant, and now I’m a representation of my aura.

Calm but energized. Outspoken but quieter than most. Wounded but healed.

I still understand how to feel.

I discarded a few characters of my life story

No enemies were made but some people don’t deserve anything from me

I realized how blind I was from time to time.

But I’m home now. Even with my eyes shut, I made it home just fine.

Unedited poems (we are similar)

Posting unedited poetry. Thank you for taking a moment in your life to read me, it is greatly appreciated. Enjoy:)

We are so similar. You’re passionate. You’re powerful. You’re hyper. You’re giddy.

At the same time, you can tune out completely from the world.

You enjoy time for you. You don’t need anyone to pursue something.

You get what you want because that’s what you feel.

You’re perceived differently because it’s intimidating to some to see someone with so much power. You still need to tame your inner beast.

You still need to learn how to protect your heart.

Passion like ours is a gift and a curse.

We love flawlessly, and we can hate the same way.

We don’t need to talk much to impact anyone; our aura speaks louder than most crowds.

So when you express yourself, you have a great responsibility.

Your words need to impact in a positivity matter.

Sometimes you’ll have to take a hit or two, straight to the heart.

Straight to the ego. But it’s okay. We can take it.

You can feel safe with me.

With me, you can be yourself without the filter.

I understand you…

You and I are the same. I understand you. This is why I can’t shake him.

We are the same.

I’ve never seen that before.

I can accept that he is not meant to be mine. I just don’t see how he’s not though.

Unedited poems (he did hurt me)

He didn’t plan on hurting me

It never felt that way

Our needs grew at different rates

And someone had to pay

I keep the painful nights to myself

As much as possible

My crew would respond to my tears with a hug and “you have to let him go”

He’s everything I could of hoped for

Pure heart, beautiful smile, gorgeous from head to toe

But regardless of how we click and flow

He couldn’t choose me over all these fucking hoes

 

Unedited poems (I will give it all up)

Sharing the longer version of my poems, unedited, uncut, just raw versions. Enjoy 🙂

I’ll give it all up
The ring, the house, the clothes
I’ll give it all up
Take it all away
Every single memory
I don’t ever want to recognize you or any place we’ve been
Take it all away from me

I just want me
Nothing else matters
All I want is my peace and my name
I just want to go back to the days
where being away from you did not make me insane

Unedited poem( he silenced my pain)

I will be posting more of my poems on here, if you scroll through mmy past post you will find poems, the ones called “Unedited poems” are the longer version of poems you may see on my Instagram or Facebook page.

Enjoy 🙂

He silenced my pain and made my innocence audible

Heartache is a beautiful place where you breakdown, rebuild and grow

I promise to care for him more than he thinks he deserves

I’ll be strong, loyal and forever dedicated…

I’ve been waiting for the right moment to speak what’s in my heart

Maybe tomorrow…

Or this summer…

God keeps telling me you can’t rush forever

I guess that’s true…

Worse case scenario he will be happy with another

Letters. (Preview to book 2)

When I came home from the hospital, I was a mother, a 20-year-old mother. For whatever reason, I knew what to do. I could not fall asleep until he fell asleep. I rocked him in my arms over and over until I got the right rhythm. I got cable because of him. Five channels were not enough if you were up all night.

I, to my mom’s relief, understood all the grief I caused as a teenager. This baby in my hands… he would look the same to me in 20 years. What the fuck would I say or do if he did not come home at the time he said he would? I would die a little and love him more than the day before.

The second I saw him, I had a lot to say. And as we grew up, and we did this together, I had a lot more to convey. So I wrote this and dedicated it to him.

A love letter from a flawed mom to her beloved son.

kiddo

No pictures.

When the relationship ended, I didn’t have any pictures to destroy or delete. We had no photos taken together. It made me sad a bit then I realised that our phones were rarely out when we were together. We often sent each other pictures of what we were doing, but we didn’t take pictures together. It didn’t even cross our minds. No selfies with bae, no hashtags “couplegoals” nothing at all.

What did it mean? Did we not share any special moments worth commemorating? Didn’t I want to show off my man with a beautiful caption inspired by his smile and warmth? I have no answers. Just a few more questions.

All I know is that we knew each other for a decade, and there was little to no trace of it. Ironically, memories are way more challenging to erase.

I can describe our first date and his smile with the same passion I always did. Those images are tattooed in my head.

My memories are tricky. If I’m nostalgic, I make them perfect. If I’m angry, I make them platonic. I don’t know what’s real anymore, but it’s okay.

I do wish I had a couple of pictures to touch, cry over and then throw away. I think it would help the heartbreak process. It does feel nice to think that we shared a lot of memories and never stopped to take a picture.

Maybe the present was so beautiful we thought we didn’t need to frame it, the future would only get better.